Is It Possible to Grieve with Grace and Joy?
Grief is one of those things that eventually we all face. As hard and painful as it can be, I wonder, is it is possible to grieve with grace and joy?
Is It Possible to Grieve With Grace and Joy?
I had faced grief before, and as much as I hated going through the process, I thought I had it figured out to some extent. When we lost our son a few years ago, I realized I was in uncharted territory! There was no such thing as figuring it out, to any extent.
I can remember going through some really dark times while he was sick, and even thinking about the advice I had given some of my students (as a counselor). It was then that I realized that what I had been telling some of them may have sounded good on paper, but in real life situations, they would need much more.
I think it is important to realize that everyone grieves in their own way. There is no magic formula or solution. Some people are quiet and reserved while others are talkative and over the top happy. I see this in my own grief as well. I tend to keep to myself and Jay is more expressive. Everyone handles it differently.
Let the Lord Carry You
If you are in the midst of grief, let yourself grieve. Trust the Lord to help you in the grief. Giving it over to the Lord is the only way I know to have any joy in these very difficult circumstances. It will be God’s grace and joy that shines in and through your life.
Don’t get me wrong, I still have moments of grief (and always will), but I can manage them a little better now. Even when the loss was so fresh, I could actually feel the peace of God and His Presence with me. I love this scripture, because I experienced it and know that it is true!
Let Others Help You Grieve
The loving people in your life can also help you navigate through such painful places. I don’t know what we would have done without our family, friends, and Church. I can’t even begin to tell you how each dear friend and family member pulled together to be there for us.
If you are going through a time of grief, don’t rely on your own strength. Let others minister to you. This can be a very humbling thing, but typically, people want to be there to support you.
If you are not going through grief but know someone who is, you can be a great blessing to them!
Outlets to Help with Grief
There are many healthy ways people find to help with painful thoughts and feelings. Most people find that having some sort of positive outlet helps. Here are a few ideas:
- Ministering to Others
- Baking/Cooking
- Writing
- Music
- Art
- Exercise
- Sports
- Volunteering
- Bible Study and reading the Word of God
- Take a vacation to get away and clear your head.
- Other Hobbies
Healthy and positive activities that you enjoy can help get you into a good place. You may even find new ways to cope as well as new hobbies. Just keep it in balance.
Other Avenues to Help with Grief
Remember that everyone is different, so you have to find what works best for you. These are just a few ideas:
- Get professional counseling.
- Talk to others who have gone through similar situations.
- Join a grief support group.
- Talk to your doctor.
- Dogs are great therapy!
Ideas to Honor Your Loved One and Help You
- Talk about them.
- Make a memory book or scrapbook.
- Make a memory bowl with some of their favorite objects.
- Have a quilt or other items made from some of their clothes.
- Celebrate special days in their honor.
- Eat their favorite food or go to their favorite places.
- Write down your favorite memories and stories of them in a journal.
- Keep your loved ones favorite scripture displayed.
“Consider it a great joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you experience various trials, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its full effect, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing.” James 1:2-4
Jacob’s favorite verse or verses were these powerful words from the Apostle Paul in James 1:2-8. Parts of these scriptures are inscribed on his headstone. A few months after he passed away, one of our granddaughters made this picture for us. Priceless!
A Positive Outlook When Grieving
It doesn’t always come naturally to think this way, but in my own life, I like to try and think of something positive. For example, I truly am so grateful for the almost 30 years we had with our son. That is a blessing!
There are many other thoughts as well, but the BEST one is that we have an anticipation of Heaven where we will see him again. Just knowing that this is not the end is encouragement beyond words!
Grief Quotes
These quotes are ones that some of our friends shared with us. I hope they bless you like they still bless me.
Encouraging Songs
I love songs and their messages! I want to share several today! Each one has a great message. Some are full of encouragement and others simply speak to my heart.
“Joy in the Morning” by Tauren Wells
“Just as Good” by Chris Renzema & Ellie Holcomb
“Praise You in This Storm” by Casting Crowns
“Desert Road” by Casting Crowns
“Sweet Hellos” by Jeff & Sheri Easter
Related Post
Here is a related post written before Thanksgiving. I hope it helps someone. Have a Thankful Heart.
Grieving with Grace and Joy
So, back to the original question – Is it possible to grieve with grace and joy? It is definitely possible but only with the Lord. I am so glad that I know Him and that He is walking with me through this journey.
If you are walking on this road of grief, call out to Him, and let Him walk with you as you grieve with grace and joy.
Until next time,
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“When I am filled with cares, Your comfort brings me joy.” Psalms 94:19
Soo good. I find comfort in the scripture We don’t grieve like those with no hope. It gives me a command and an anchor to hold onto.
Love this!!! Thank you for sharing!!
I’m so sorry about the loss of your son. Some losses are too big to ever get over. Like you, I’ve discovered that grief and joy can coexist. I still grieve some tremendous losses, but even in those times, I’m glad there are still pockets of joy alongside the grief. Tauren Wells’ song is one of go-to songs! So glad you linked up at Grace & Truth.
Thank you so much! I love the way you worded that, “grief and joy can coexist!” That is so true and encouraging!
Susan, your blog is new to me and I’m so glad I found it in the Instaencouragements linkup. My heart aches for you regarding the loss of your son. I saw in your About section that he died in 2019, the same year both my parents went home to heaven. Grief is such a strange, hard journey, and I appreciate your thoughts about how it is different for everyone. Music has been a balm for me too; even now, I regularly tear up in church, not because I’m sad about something specific, but because the songs just evoke emotion. I have a feeling you understand. 🙂
I definitely understand! The songs can be the hardest, and yet the most uplifting part of the service! I am really sorry to hear about both of your parents, that had to be extremely hard! I can’t even begin to imagine! I am really glad we connected on here, and I hope you have a wonderful weekend!
Susan, I am sorry for the loss of your son. I cannot imagine the pain it brought. I am not sure grief ever fully goes away for we miss those we have loved. I am glad for the gift of memories which are a comfort and do bring joy. May we cling to the hope we have in Christ.